On the American Idol Season 11 Finale

I’ll get straight to the point: I was not the least bit surprised with the results. Maybe it’s the pessimist in me, but I never doubted that Phillip Phillips would win against Jessica Sanchez. It’s not that I don’t love Jessica—heck, even while I was strongly telling off my family to not get their hopes up, I still secretly imagined all the great possibilities that having a winner like her would present. And maybe my deep admiration is exactly the reason I didn’t want to hope too much. The disillusionment would have been unbearable. I knew that most people wouldn’t vote based on actual talent, that they would place looks and charisma before it.

I don’t feel bad that Phillip won. Actually, I like him best out of all the male contestants. Though he is not groundbreakingly good, there is a certain sensitivity about him which draws me in. I have a soft spot for artists, I guess. It also doesn’t hurt that he is cute. Besides, I have no fear for Jessica’s future—I believe that she has already shown herself capable of making it big, regardless if she won Idol or not. We know a lot of past runner ups who have made for themselves respectably—Katharine McPhee, Jennifer Hudson and David Archuleta, to name a few.

And I find it funny that I say all these things now because in the very beginning I actually didn’t see anything too special in Jessica. When Mom showed me her Youtube video auditioning with Whitney Houston’s I Will Always Love You, I wasn’t terribly impressed. But when I watched the performances following that one, I couldn’t believe I was listening to a sixteen-year-old. She sounds very much like a pro. I guess she has known from experience how to properly attack a song. I especially loved her rendition of Dance With My Father. That one, I think, is her most memorable.

Just wanted to give my two cents. Hahaha. Kbye.

What the heck

I haven’t checked my messages in a long time, and wow are they many! Seriously I am touched that some of you are still concerned about me.

Thank you Kim, Faye, Max! I wish I could log in here more often but I tend to forget to do so.. Kinda surprising as I used to be so addicted. Hahaha.

Thank you, my very few but very precious followers, for still following me despite my neglectful attitude towards this blog. Something potentially great’s coming up and I’ll make sure to blog about it once it’s decided! Hehehe.

I’ll be back <3

I don’t want to become a boring person. You know, that person who talks of nothing but work and how she hates it. It would totally be ok if I am totally pursuing my dream and loving every minute of it, but I’m not. This is not my place. This is not my niche.

I’ve always constantly worried about being a lowlife. I dread being jobless, being broke, being so unstable that I’d never last a year in one company. I dread it all. But tonight I read an insightful article at Thought Catalog, and it reminded me that I’m still actually pretty young. I have many years ahead of me, and it’s perfectly understandable that I’m still looking for my place in this world, that I’m still soul-searching. I realized that it’s ok to not be ok with my current situation. It’s ok to want to be somewhere else. It’s still ok to explore at this point, because it is the only way I can keep myself from getting stuck in a lackluster job.

I want, sometime this year, to be able to get away for a while, go on a trip to a nice beach and leave everything behind for a few days. Just to be able to really reflect on my life. Just to be able to think without other people’s voices drowning the sound of my own. I want that, and many others. I want to have more wonderful sceneries to take with my cam, I want to be busy and to enjoy every second of my busy-ness, I want my eyes to twinkle from all the great happenings I’m seeing and participating in. I want to feel alive again.

I sure hope I snag that follow-up interview I’ve been waiting for all week. I wish I get the job. It doesn’t matter if, like this one I have at present, it turns out to be just another job. At least I will not have to live with the shame of knowing that I lacked the courage to take a chance. At least I will not be guilty of not trying. And I can always look again.

i dont care who you are i will read your read more

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shout out to my mom for making the most perfect kid ever

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